Better Is One Hour In Church...

So I'm a youth mentor for the youth group at my church. Have I ever mentioned that before? I'm sorry if I didn't. I'm a mentor, and I also help lead worship. Youth is what occupies my Friday nights. The kids are loud, they are hyper, they are on fire for God (sometimes), they can be so incredibly mature, or so incredibly stupid. And I love them. I don't always know how to connect with them or relate to them, but I love them none the less.

I love seeing them grow ever so slowly and steadily through this journey called "TEENAGER." I love seeing what God is doing in the youth group, and what He is doing through the youth group. It's so encouraging. It builds my faith a little more each week.

I'm reminded over and over and over and over and over that He is faithful, and He is moving. He is doing the work, not us. He works through us, but it's still Him. We just have to show up and be willing.

Anyway, tonight we had a worship night with the kids, and the elders of the church. It was....amazing. The elders really wanted to pray for the youth and encourage them, and I think they needed it. Heck, I needed it.

Another amazing thing is how God always comes through for me on youth nights. Tonight was one of those nights where I really didn't want to go, but I knew that I had to, and that God was going to move. They say that the times you don't want to go are the times you really need to go.

Now, I love worship, I really do. I have a passion for it, it's where God moves in me and speaks to me, and....it's my element. (I also happen to have a degree in Music Ministry, so that works out really nicely).

But there are so many times when I come into youth group and I'm getting ready to do worship, and I just don't feel like it. I have a rotten attitude, I whine (in my head) and make up all sorts of excuses as to why I shouldn't participate this time. "God, I'm just not going to give it my all this time, because I don't want to. I'll fake it, and You can do what you do, okay?"

But God gets to me EVERY time (which is good). He tells me to surrender to Him and fix my attitude, because He won't work through me if I'm not faithful and willing. So tonight I started singing the first song, I lifted my hands, and just focused on Him. And it worked, like it does every time. I felt the presence of God, I was encouraged, my soul was lifted up. But only after I made the choice did the feelings come.

One of the songs we sang was "Better Is One Day In Your Courts." Now, I must tell you, I used to hate that song. I thought the chorus was so empty and lame. "Better is one day in Your courts?" Where are "Your courts"? This is totally not relevant.

But then God gave me a revelation a little while ago, and now I LOVE that song! And today while we were singing it, He gave me another revelation about it. The very first line of the song is "How lovely is Your dwelling place, O Lord Almighty." And as soon as I sang that line, I felt such an intimacy with God in that moment. I felt like I was literally in His house.

Like if I went to my cousin's house that she just decorated, and she decorated it especially for me, because she wanted me to like it, she wanted to bless me. As soon as I walk in, her whole heart is silently pleading that I love the house, that I absolutely love it! So of course, when I walk in there, it just feels so...perfect, and I would say to her, "This is such a lovely place! What a lovely home you have."

That's what I felt when I sang the first line of that song. That God had invited me into His very cozy, personal, intimate home, and He wanted desperately for me to love it. I felt like He was showing me all the rooms, and asking me over and over, "Do you like it Jenene? I painted it this colour just for you. I chose these decorations because I thought you would like them. Do you like it? Please say you like it." I felt like I was in God's home, and I loved it. It felt.....like a home! It was so intimate.

I can't really describe a feeling like that, but...I guess He felt like a Lover. He is my Lover, wooing me with the beautiful things He is doing just for me, because He loves me SO much, and He is just aching for me to love Him back. It was so incredible. I just got lost in the song.

I forgot that I was even singing, I forgot that I was on a stage, I forgot that the kids were there, I forgot about everything. It was just me and God in that moment. I was being spiritually swept off my feet by God. What a Love I have.

Happy Hands and Other Good Things

I had the best vacation ever.

I think I needed to take that time off. Not that I was stressed, but it felt so good to be away from the ordinary for a while. I spent 5 wonderful days on the west coast. It was warm, and everything is green and blooming, and the mountain air combined with the ocean air makes for Jenene taking deep breaths every time she's outside. Glorious!

I got to be with Art, hang out with my friends and see them graduate. I also got to dress up and go out for dinner, go on dates, go to the beach, and watch way too much TV.

AND I got to spend a day with Art at his job (b/c he had to work on the Friday that I was there). Art is a bellman at a 4-diamond Resort Golf Spa (and he is very good at what he does, he makes some pretty sweet tips). Anyway, we wanted to be together as much as possible, so I went with him to work.

The hotel is BEAUTIFUL! I mean, it's on the coast, it only has the #1 golf course in the state, so what can you expect? Yeah. There are so many lounge areas, with plush couches and chairs, all looking out towards the bay, and there's always a fireplace near by. The rooms are so cozy, definitely not your typical hotel rooms.

And the restaurants. Oh, the restaurants. Great food, great service, great atmosphere, not-so-great prices (if great = cheap). But it's a freaking resort. Of course it's high-class, top-quality and slightly pricey. Oh, and did I mention the spa?

When you go in for a spa treatment, they send you down the hall to a quiet room. It's a softly lit room with more plush chairs, soft soothing music playing, fresh beverages of your choice, and of course, a fire place. It's so cozy warm in there, and the whole point of that room is to relax you before your spa treatment. And talk about royal treatment.

For a manicure and pedicure you sit in a massage chair, with a heated up neck warmer, and your feet soaking in a little foot jacuzzi, and they do the cuticle treatment and the sea salt scrub and the deep massage (all the way up the arm and leg to the elbows and knees).

Then they do a paraffin wax mitt, where your feet or hands are are "soaking" in hot wax (don't worry, it doesn't burn). Then they peel that off, leaving you with the softest skin imaginable. Then comes the actual polish, and another stint in the quiet room while the polish is drying. It is heaven!

And how do I know all these things? Not because I was chatting it up with the front desk girl. My Most Wonderfulest Boyfriend On Earth BOUGHT me a professional manicure and pedicure at the resort spa.

He had been telling me for quite some time he had a surprise for me, and this was it. It was amazing. I recommend it to EVERYONE. So I spent a good 3 hours in the spa, and I felt like a queen afterward. I had been worried that I wouldn't have time to do my nails before the grad festivities, but he solved that problem for me! He is the best!!!!!

The rest of the weekend was good too: dressing up, various dinner dates, an afternoon at the beach, gelato, hanging out with friends that I hadn't seen in nearly a year. But the mani and pedi was by far the highlight. I took pictures of my lovely hands and feet, and I promise I will put some up soon.

Oh, besides the fact that it was such a wonderful gift, it also helped me complete another goal! Yay! Goal #103: get a professional pedicure. Check!

Soon and Very Soon...

...I am going to be with Art! I am mucho excited and tres ecstatic and very very anxious to get out of here. 4 more hours and I will be sitting on a plane, waiting to take off!

I'll be getting back next Tuesday very late, but I'm not going to think about coming back. I'm just going to enjoy being there. Oh, I thought this day would NEVER arrive! And now I'm practically counting down the minutes. Okay everyone, have a great weekend, don't miss me too much! ;) BYE!

Connecting the Dots. And Some Thoughts.

I can't remember where I heard this, or when, or who said it, or what kind of setting I was in, but I remember it was so simple and profound, and it really changed the way I related to God.

"God knows all. He knew your whole life before it began, every step you would take, good or bad. He knew when He created humans that they would screw up and turn away from Him. He knows that you are born into an imperfect world, and that you are not perfect all by yourself.

Therefore, you cannot disappoint God. He is never surprised when you make a mistake. He does not have false expectations about you. He doesn't expect you to be perfect. You cannot surprise Him or disappoint Him."

I am paraphrasing a little bit, but that was the basic message, and the way I understood it. I always had this view of God that He was disappointed when I fell in that same old place I always fall, and so I never wanted to go to Him and confess.

Realizing that He isn't disappointed because He doesn't expect me to not screw up basically changed my life. It's still hard sometimes to remember that God isn't disappointed, because I've been thinking that way for so long, but it's certainly getting better.

And He is faithful in showing me that He loves me and forgives me, because even when I've turned away He still blesses me and works through me. Even when I've not been faithful to Him, He is always faithful to me.

Something I heard in church this morning further clarified this point: "God has no condemnation on anything I have ever done. I have been covered, cleansed and forgiven by the blood of the Lamb. Therefore, when God looks at me, He sees Jesus."

When God looks at me, He sees Jesus.

Incredible. And wonderful.

More Goals!

Yeah yeah yeah, I know, I haven't posted much this past week. I like to blog while I'm at work (I don't know why), but we just did month-end, so I was super busy. No time to blog. And then I've been ill. But now month-end is all done (for me at least), and I'm feeling better. So now I have time again!

I think my favorite post of all time (since I started blogging) is the List of Goals For My Life. I'm really quite proud of it. Unfortunately, I add goals faster than I can accomplish them. I just added 3 new ones.

However, I also recently accomplished another goal! Ever since I was a little girl, I have always wanted to sponsor a child. I remember watching World Vision, and feeling sorry for the children who didn't have enough to eat or wear. My mom has sponsored a couple of kids over the years, through various organizations, but I wanted to sponsor one myself, with my own money.

In church last week a woman was talking about the burden that God has been growing in her heart for the impoverished children of this world. I only remember one thing that she said: "I could no longer feed my children 3 times a day and tuck them into their warm beds at night, knowing that there are thousands of children out there who don't have even those simple comforts, and that I'm not doing anything about it."

I thought to myself, "I can do something. I can't help thousands, but I can help one." So jumped up from my seat even before she was finished talking and went out of the sanctuary and into the foyer, where there was a table with 12 children's pictures on it. I slowly started looking over them and praying, "God, which one?"

God continues to be so cool about how He works things out. Each envelope had a window through which the child's picture would show, and beneath the picture was their name, their birthday and where they were from.

Now I have always wanted to go to South America, and I don't even know why it holds such appeal for me. But I thought, even if I never get the chance to go myself, I can send a part of myself there. I can give someone my financial support and more importantly, my love, and I can change their life.

So I looked at the locations beneath each picture. Most of them said Mexico or Guatemala. Central America, it's close, but I wanted South America. The last picture I came across sat kind of crooked inside the envelope, so I couldn't see the birthday or where the child was from. I lifted part of the paper away from the window to get a better look, and behold: It read Peru. The only one from South America!

Plus, the photo was of a little girl looking back at me, and I had wanted to sponsor a girl, though I would have taken a boy if that's where God had led me. Here's another cool connection: her birthday is on my sister and brother-in-law's anniversary, Dec. 17.

So everybody, meet Jazmin.

She is 5 years old, she lives in Carmen Alto, Peru (northeast of the capitol of Lima). She lives with her parents and one other sibling. Her father is sometimes employed as a labourer, making the equivalent of $86 a month. She doesn't got to school right now (but that will all change).

She is a girl after my own heart: she loves playing house and playing with dolls. And it's so amazing how much $35 a month will change her life. It doesn't seem like much, but it's going to make such a difference. I'm very thankful that God brought her into my life. I don't even know her, she's just a picture on a card, but she has stolen my heart.

Fever, And Not Like Michael Buble

So I took a sick day today. I didn't go to work. I had a fever, I was all achy and stuff. I HATE fevers. Ok, I'm sure there's nobody out there who actually likes fevers, but they just really suck.

Colds I can handle: coughing, runny nose, that type of thing. But fevers? They just get me down. I cannot get comfortable in my bed or on the couch, I cannot maintain a proper temperature, I don't want to eat, but then if I don't, I'm get weak.

I can't sleep properly, I have weird dreams that are worse than nightmares. I basically feel like I got into a fight with a moving bus. And I lost. You know how people use the term, "You're fighting a cold"? Yeah. You don't fight colds. You get beat up by colds.

Well, I certainly hope this isn't the start of a cold. I feel a lot better, I'm glad I took a sick day. I didn't want to, because I have that vacation coming up, and I really can't afford to miss any work. But we have a company policy when it comes to being sick: keep it to yourself.

As in, stay home so you can feel better, and also so that you don't pass it on to anybody in the office. It's a good policy! And so far, it seems to be working.

It's especially crucial for me not to go to work when I'm sick, because of my pregnant co-worker. I work very closely with her, and I do not want to be passing on my cold to her and her baby. But I'm feeling better. Here's hoping I'll be going to work tomorrow.

Sympathy

Ok, so you know how my sister is pregnant? And if you didn't know that, well, um...there are some obvious signs at the top of my page, in the forms of a countdown, and a blog. Anyway.

So she's pregnant, and the last time I talked to her, she was feeling fine. The nausea is gone, and it's replaced by more frequent hunger, which is good. She hasn't had any unusual cravings, but she has had cravings (one was for Mexican food found only in the States, and she satisfied her craving only to find out that the baby unfortunately does NOT like it). And being her only sister and the future Aunt of this baby, I like being a part of this pregnancy.

Except the part where I start having sympathy symptoms. I've heard of husbands experiencing sympathy pains/cravings/moods, etc. But never sisters! So far I don't have any sympathy pains or moods (I don't think). But the cravings! Holy Crackers!

Two weeks ago it was mushroom soup. Last week it was Pringles chips. Two days ago it was Kraft Dinner mac n' cheese. And today: today I was craving corn dogs or hot dogs first thing this morning, and just now I am craving toast (seriously, who craves toast?). And I don't necessarily crave these things even when I'm hungry.

I had breakfast this morning, so I was full and fine, but then around 9am I really wanted a hot dog! Or a corn dog. Some sort of edible dog. The other weird thing is that not only do I crave these things, but I can actually smell them. I swear it's in the air! When I was craving mushroom soup, I could actually smell it.

Or maybe this is just all in my head. But it's not totally a bad thing. I feel like it gives me license to eat whatever I want, just because I crave it. That's probably not the best mind set to have, but whatever.

Now I'm hungry for real! Hopefully all this food talk hasn't sparked a mass craving frenzy. Trying to satisfy those intense cravings could result in some serious injuries. Or maybe just a little weight gain.

Mmmmm, foooooooooood......................

A Holiday?

Greetings, faithful and semi-faithful readers of my blog. I was just visiting another blog (her name is Ruth), and she informed the world that yesterday was National Comment Day! I did some research on this very obscure holiday, and I realized that it is a week-long celebration!

So whenever you visit any blog this week, be sure to leave a comment. I know that some of you comment on blogs faithfully, but others may not. I do not always leave comments, so I am challenging myself to do so. And by the way, you can start celebrating by commenting on MY blog first! (Since you must comment on blogs you read, and you are obviously reading this right now).

Here's another suggestion: you don't have to leave a comment on this particular blog that I wrote. If you have time to read any of my previous blogs and would like to leave a comment there, by all means, do so!

And my best suggestion yet: inform your readers of this holiday by posting a blog of your own! That way you can be sure that YOU will receive just as many lovely comments as you give! Happy first week of April everybody!