My Grandmother

I was going to do Sophia's Three Month post, but that will have to wait. Today I need to talk about my Grandma.

In March, just before I had Sophia, my grandma was admitted to the hospital. I don't remember why. I think her stay there was three weeks? Or maybe a month. Anyway, she did get to go back home, but she never really got better.

My family thought that she maybe caught some sort of infection from her hospital stay, and in May, just before my mom came to visit me, my grandma went back to the hospital. The doctors had a few different ideas as to what might be wrong, and very recently, a nurse told my mom that they thought my grandma was experiencing heart failure. They figured it wouldn't be long before she died. I asked my mom how long "not long" was, but nobody knew.

"Not long" turned out to be two days. This morning, my 91 year old grandmother died. My family has lost a great prayer warrior.

It's a funny thing about grief. My grandma wanted to go to heaven, and we didn't want to see her suffer. So I'm not exactly sad that she's in heaven. I don't grieve for her. I grieve for me, because I won't get to be at her funeral. I grieve for Sophia, because she never got to meet her great-grandmother. I grieve for my sister's unborn baby, who also never got to meet his or her great-grandmother.

I grieve for my cousin, who will be getting married in August, that grandma won't be at that wedding. I grieve for all the future spouses and babies that have yet to join our family, that they didn't get to know this tiny, wonderful woman.

At the same time, it feels almost selfish to think that way. My grandma isn't dead, she's just not alive here on earth anymore. But she is very much alive in heaven. She is with her husband now (my grandpa died in 1986). She is with most of her brothers and sisters (I think my mom has one aunt who is still alive). And most importantly, she is with Jesus.

I don't have a recent picture of her, but I do have a happy one. (I stole this from my sister.)



I love you, Grandma. I'll miss you. I am so very blessed to have had a grandma like you. I pray that I will also be blessed with many years on this earth, but more importantly, that I will become a prayer warrior like you were. (And as my sister said), I pray that I will raise up prayer warriors.

Her race is finished. Now we pick up where she left off. She may have been a tiny woman, but she leaves some big shoes to fill. And that's a good thing. That's the way it should be.

So I will be sad for what we all have lost. But I will be happy for what heaven has gained. My grandma was a good and faithful servant, and has received her reward: Paradise.