Let's Talk About Work, Shall We?

Here's a word no one likes: insubordination.

Last week Friday, I experienced it for the first time. Now, I'm not some high and mighty boss. But I am a team lead. Some aspects of my job are answering questions, training, writing standard work, and making sure people are following standard work. So, sometimes corrections need to be made.

At my job, I ask the members of team to make their own corrections. That way, the learn about the things that they are doing wrong, and eventually, they make less mistakes. So I asked this one coworker to fix something she had done.

Now. The thing is. She hadn't done it wrong, per say. But there was a more preferable way, and I didn't want her to get in the habit of doing things in the less preferable way. Unfortunately, it was going to be a lot of work, and she had already spent quite a bit of time on it. I understand, perfectly, how disheartening that can be, do undo all your hard work, and then do it all over again. But that's the way work goes sometimes. Right? Am I the only one to think this?

She didn't seem to think so. She FLAT. OUT. REFUSED. She went as far as to tell me that she was 110% sure that she did it right, and that it would be fine. When I tried to explain to her why we didn't do it that way, she interrupted me, and told me that if I didn't like the way she had done, than I have a problem, not her.

So I brought the work back to my desk, quietly escorted myself to the bathroom, silently screamed my head off for about a minute, and then calmed down, and did the work that she refused to do.

But, being a lead, I wanted to see if I could turn this situation around. I tried to see things from her point of view, and even went as far as to email someone about it our standard work (someone who influences a lot of my decisions about standard work), and asked if we could change it, because the "less preferable" way would be easier.

I also spoke to my manager about the situation. I told her I was shocked and hurt, and I didn't know what to do. My manager advised me to email my coworker, and ask if everything was alright. I was advised not to rule out personal issues as well, and to assure my coworker that she is allowed to talk to someone about this stuff. So I did. And got no reply.

Until today. The same situation came up, and I walked over to my coworker, and even before I had the chance to open my mouth, she said, "I won't make the change Jenene, and there is nothing you can do about it." (By the way, this person is pushing 60, and when she was hired? I thought she was the sweetest and most pleasant person in the world. Try to imagine your grandma having the biggest attitude in the world. Yeah. Unbelievable.)

So I asked if I could have a conversation with her in private, and when I asked her why she was so hesitant to follow our standard work, and her words were FAR more shocking than the first time we butted heads. Here are the following reasons she gave me for not doing what I had asked her to do:

1. She isn't being paid enough to do what she does. (Yet she's never spoken to anyone about this, and she won't quit, so......)

2. She thinks I'm being too anal about all of it. (Um, hi: it's called standard work for a reason. The way we're supposed to the work is the way we're supposed to do the work. That's not called anal. That's called doing your job.)

3. [You're guys are really going to like this one]: she thinks that I don't know what I'm doing. (Her words. I am apparently unfit to do my job. Never mind the fact that my manager asked me to take this position, and I have trained almost 30 people on various aspects of what I do.)

4. She told me that she thinks all I know how to do is follow a checklist. (Basically, I'm a flaming moron.)

5. According to her, I contradict myself. All the time. (This one is actually halfway accurate. We are changing our standard work ALL THE TIME. And it's frustrating. But again, part of the job.)

6. According to her, I don't understand how things are done around here, but she does. (She has worked for us a grand total of 4 months. Me? A year. Which isn't a long time. But it's long enough to make her statement completely untrue.)

7. Finally, the most bizarre accusation: I have anger issues, and I'm taking them out on her. (Who here thinks she should be pointing that finger the other way?)


Yes. This is all almost verbatim. She said all these things, to my face, in a matter of minutes. And after I got over the shock (and had myself a little cry in the ladies room), I went about the rest of my day, happy and helpful and cheerful, and SHE remained glum and continued to snap at people for the next seven hours. I had not accused her of anything. I simply asked her questions, some of which she answered (she didn't feel like giving me specifics about which parts of my job I'm not fit to do).

I simply told myself to get over it, because, well, I had to. I still had a job to do, questions to answer, and people to help. Being angry the rest of the day does absolutely no good. I took the high road, and truly? I'm over it. (Well, almost. As you can tell, I still had a bit of sarcasm I needed to get out of my system.) But I'm harboring no hurt or resentment, because I know it won't help. And in a strange way, I'm kind of relieved to know the truth. I no longer have to wonder why she's so testy.

I do wonder why she doesn't quit though. I mean, she is CLEARLY unhappy. It doesn't make any sense. I had another meeting with my manager today, who has now taken over the situation, because obviously, this is not a part of my job, and my manager is convinced that she's trying to get herself fired. Which also doesn't make any sense. Maybe she wants to collect unemployment. Which is worse than collecting a wage.

So that's the unexpected drama at work. I never thought, in 10 trillion years, that I would ever have to deal with something like this. I work with such amazing people, there is NO ONE at the office that I dislike, even a little. And I guess I was naive enough to think that, these days, anyone would be grateful for a job. My coworker sure seemed like she was grateful. At first.

I honestly don't know whether we can convince her to quit, or if she'll be fired, and I'm not even sure that I want those things to happen. Yes, she can be difficult to deal with. But she is a valuable member of our team (and I have told her this) and we would be in trouble without her help. On the other hand, this is unacceptable behavior, and it's bad for the work environment, and it looks bad on my manager, if we just let her stay and continue to be belligerent.

Something's got to change, and I'll find out what this is tomorrow. Maybe. In the meantime, I'm going to be as kind and gentle as I can be, I'm going to brush it off if she lashes out, and do my best not to aggravate the situation anymore. And that's all I can do.