Well this diet thing hasn't been as awful as I thought it would be. I mean I'm still tempted to eat what I'm not supposed to, and there have been a couple of times where I was really pushing the limits of how much sugar I should be taking in.
But I am so determined to eat healthier and get my body back on track, that I've been pretty good at "just saying no." Like a drug campaign. Sugar is a drug! Maybe that's what I should start thinking of sugar as: a drug.
My mom is also very supportive, so that helps. We went to a bulk foods store that we really like, and I stocked up on healthy snacks, like unseasoned mixed nuts, and another slightly seasoned snack with pretzels in it. They're good, they're good for me, and at least if I'm trying to fill myself up with healthy snacks, I won't be so tempted to have the unhealthy ones, because I'm full.
But my biggest motivating factor is knowing the slippery slope of "just one." If I allow myself to have just one sugary snack today, then I'll allow myself just one more tomorrow. And the day after. And then it will become "just two" in one day. And before I know it, I'm back to eating the same way I was before, and I'll be back to having the same problems I had before. And it is NOT worth it.
This diet is making me realize more and more that the battle isn't against the physical realm, but the spiritual realm. The battle is in my mind. I can avoid those things that are bad for me when I renew my mind, and choose to think differently about them.
If I see any and all forms of sugar as my friend, then I will allow myself to ingest those foods, and I'll be doing myself a lot of harm without even realizing it. It took 22 years of not really caring what I ate and how much of it I ate before it came back to bite me in the butt.
It's the same thing with sin. We allow ourselves to be okay with sin, and we let it go on and on, and then one day we wake up and look at our spiritual life, and it's all sick and damaged. We hardly know how we got there, because we think, "well, yes, I'm not perfect, I sin here and there, but it's really not that bad. I don't have to worry about the little ones."
Let me tell you, a little bit here and there adds up to a lot when you give it time. Thankfully our Father is so loving and forgiving, and He is quick to heal a broken spiritual life when we let Him. Of course, that healing can only last if we nurture it and not allow ourselves to go back to the way we were before.
Which I guess is why I can't really call this a diet, because diets are usually temporary. If I want to be healthy again and stay healthy, I have to keep this up for the rest of my life. Which might not be so difficult if there weren't 2 boxes of free donuts sitting on the kitchen table here at the office. I can see them from my desk.
Oh, and Ruth, thank you for the cinnamon bun from your garage sale. I'm sure they were great, but I had to turn that one down.
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