NOT Baby Related, For Once (except for maybe #3)

I'm going to try my hardest to come up with some non baby news. I have a feeling this will be even more difficult once I have the baby. But anyways. Here we go.

1. We went to a TobyMac concert last night. It was awesome! He puts on great shows. What's funny is that it was a last-minute decision. I'm think we only bought the tickets four days ago. Art heard he was coming to Seattle, and he really wanted to go. (I didn't realize my husband was such a big TobyMac fan until quite recently.) He finally looked up the tickets, and realized that they were pretty cheap, so he asked me if we could go.

He's so funny. He's like a kid sometimes. I keep joking that we don't need to have a baby, because I already have one! Anyway, he asked me if we could go, and of course I said yes! I'm glad we went. I suppose I should feel a bit bad that Art didn't get to go right down to the stage. He told me that he's ALWAYS in the mosh pit. But he stayed in our seats for me, because there was no way I was going that close!

I was a tiny bit worried about the loud music, and if it would affect the baby, but it's all good. Many pregnant women have gone to rock concerts, and their babies didn't suffer hearing loss or anything.

2. I mentioned in my last post that I need to improve my eating habits. I've been eating perfect for over a week now, and I feel like myself again! (Perfect = no processed foods, no refined sugars, no grains. If it has a list of ingredients, and those ingredients are not real/recognizable foods, I don't go near it.)

I actually began to notice a difference within 24 hours of eating better, and in three days, everything was normal again. I did treat myself to some ice cream last night, but I haven't noticed any negative symptoms yet. But I'm going to keep up with the perfect eating, because I don't want to fool myself into thinking that it was just a temporary thing, and then start "treating" myself on a regular basis. Because I know what it does to me, and it's NOT a treat.

3. I was hoping to have a cloth diaper shower, but now I don't think it's going to happen. My friend (who is also going to be my doula) wants to host one for me. She is so very sweet and selfless, and her intentions bless my heart. But in this case, I think that perhaps, maybe, it's just not realistic.

She doesn't live in the same town as we do ("we" being Art and me, and all the people I might want at the shower). Plus she lives in an apartment, so she can't host it at her place. We live in an apartment, so she can't host it at my place. Also she doesn't know any of the people that I would want at the shower. My connection to her is completely separate from every other connection that I have. (Yes, believe it or not, she and I have no mutual friends.)

She doesn't go to our church, so she doesn't know the church ladies I might invite. She doesn't go to the gym, so she doesn't know the gym ladies I might invite. What I'm trying to get at is that if this shower is going to happen, it's up to me to figure out where the shower can take place, and it's up to me to invite everyone. I'm half planning my own shower.

And not only that, but the women that I would invite? I don't feel like I know them that well. Especially the church ladies. I've spoken to a few of them only a few times. I never see these people outside of church or the gym. I consider them my acquaintances, not my friends. (I would love it if they were my friends, but these things take time.)

Overall, it just seems awkward and tasteless. Am I overreacting? I know I have a tendency to focus on the negative. I call myself a "realist", which usually ends up being more "pessimist." But I seriously can't see a solution here. And my friend and I have been stuck at this point since she first suggested it, back in....October?

Also, I just shouldn't be planning my own shower. That just isn't done. So I love my friend for wanting to do this for me, but I'm thinking that it's just not going to go anywhere. And I hope I don't sound selfish, like I'm hoping more people buy me more things. It's that I feel bad for my friend. She's had her heart set on this for so long, and I don't know how to tell her that I don't want to have to work out the logistics. She's such a gentle person, and it's going to hurt her if I tell her to let it go.

I'm going to ask Art if we can use our tax return to purchase the remainder of the baby items (which include diapers, and also some bigger things like the playpen and stroller). I've only got a couple of months left, and no more showers.

(Actually that's not true. Art's mom wants to throw me a shower. Some of you might remember my talking about the Filipino wedding shower that she hosted. Everyone bought us crystal. Lots and lots of crystal things that we will never, ever use. Filipino's are warm and generous people, but they're not big on using registries. They have their own ideas as to what new brides or new moms should have. Needless to say, I'm really curious to see how the Filipino shower turns out.)

4. So that's a bit of...disappointing?...news. But I've also got good news: we're moving! (Again?!) Yes, again. The apartment suite right next to ours is a two-bedroom. When we moved into this one-bedroom, we realized that our next door neighbors were friends of ours! And they told us that they had been in that place for five years, and their lease was about to expire, and they wanted to get out of there.

So we talked to the landlords, and they said it would work. We're not breaking our lease, and we told them we could guarantee them three years. So they asked for a holding deposit, and now we officially have dibs on it! Our friends are done moving out (I think), so the landlords just need to go through and paint and clean the carpets, and make any repairs that need to be made, and close things up with the old tenants, and I don't think that will take too long. They're great landlords, and they get things done quick.

So in a couple of weeks, we (hopefully) get to move in! And it's going to be the easiest move ever. We just have to walk out our door, and walk across the connecting "balcony/walkway" and through the door of the new place. No stairs. No packing. I can literally pull a stack of dishes from one cupboard, walk over, and put them in a cupboard over there.

And did I mention it has two bedrooms? (AND two bathrooms?!) The baby will have his or her own room! No playpen in the living room! And more closet space! Yeah. I'm pretty stoked. The bedrooms are smaller, unfortunately, but we've done tiny squishy bedroom before. Plus, the master bedroom has its own bathroom. So Art and I get to have separate bathrooms. :)

My bathroom will be the "public bathroom", because my bathroom will always be clean. And my bathroom has a linen closet in it. And I get to say "my bathroom." (I just realized that this means we also have to buy another shower curtain, and more floor rugs, and another soap dispenser, and two sets of shampoo and conditioner, and two toothpastes....maybe I'll make it all pink and purple, just to be ridiculous.)

5. Things are going well at work. We just got some new programming put into place, which will make our jobs easier. We've been in our new database for over a year now, but I don't think our parent company really realized how inconvenient it was for us. The database wasn't really meant for the type of things our company does. But we had to transition to it, because our "parents" said so.

This year, the managers at our company finally got to sit down with some of the programmers, and they got to see, firsthand, just how difficult our lives were. They were astounded at how long each process took, and the insane work-arounds that we had to do just so that we could keep operating the way we had always done.

So they came up with a bunch of new programming that is specific to the type of things that our company does, so that we can work more efficiently, make fewer mistakes, and ultimately, have happier customers!

My supervisor made a joke that we're such cheap dates. As in, the littlest things make us all so happy and giddy, like how the current date auto-fills in certain screens, instead of us having to type it on ourselves. Or, when we have to choose something from a list, the list is now alphabetized. Stuff like that. But it really does make a difference! I think the biggest thing, for me, is seeing how the higher-ups are actually working WITH us on this. I think a lot of times we feel like they don't care about the little people.

So I'm happy that these things are improving. I won't be there much longer, but while I'm still there, I want to see these types of positive changes. (And hopefully positive changes keep happening long after I'm gone!)

And that's the latest news in my life! See, there ARE other things happening around me besides having a baby in my tummy. It's just that I'm mostly focused on the baby. (As if that wasn't obvious.)

Oh, I thought of one more thing:

6. I just bought a new deodorant/antiperspirant. I think the brand is called Sure. And I hate it. It doesn't work. So all week, I've felt as though I stink. My BO is just out there, for the world to enjoy. I've been trying to compensate by applying yummy lotions and perfume, but I can still smell my less-than-lovely pits, and I'm paranoid that others can as well.

Here's the thing: I hate deodorant/antiperspirant for women. It's either a white stick, or a gel, or a powder. And they ALL say "Goes on clear!", except NONE of them do. If it's a white stick, it goes on white. If it's a powder, it goes on white. If it's a gel, you end up with sticky pits. No matter which way you slice it, your pits and clothes will carry the evidence of what you applied to your underarms that morning.

I don't understand why deodorant/antiperspirant companies don't make an ACTUAL clear stick for women. They do it for men. Why not women? (And no, I'm not going to start using my husband's clear stick. I don't want to smell like a man. I won't lie: I'm tempted. But I've resisted thus far. Although I may have to cave if this continues.)

So, I need advice. What do you use? Do your pits and clothes display it and you just put up with it? Or have you actually found a brand that "Goes on clear!" like they say it does, despite the fact that it's a white stick or powder? And where do you buy it?

I usually just go to Target or Wal-Mart for these things, but if I don't find something soon, I guess I might have to resort to buying online. Which irks me, because I would have to pay shipping for such a small, basic item that I SHOULD be able to find in stores.

Okay, I'm done for real this time. Have a great weekend!

Feelings. Or, If You Are Filipino: "Peelings"

So here I am. Not feeling that great. Again.

Today I posted on Facebook that I don't quite feel like I've fully recovered from the flu, and I got the flu almost a month ago! It hasn't been constant, but I'd say that, for the past few weeks, I've spent several afternoons and/or evenings feeling unwell, gross, or even nauseated. And there have been a couple of other symptoms as well, that I won't get into.

Remember how I said my New Year's Resolution was a continuation from last year: To be as healthy as possible? I thought I was doing a pretty good job, but now that I think about, I really haven't.

I've been so proud of myself, making healthy breakfasts and dinners, buying vegetables I wouldn't normally buy, and experimenting with new, healthy recipes. If I'm lucky, there's enough left over for lunch the next day.

But at work. At work it's a different story. Yes, I have my healthy lunch with me. And all these healthy meals have made me think that it's okay to partake in the various treats that are always present at the office, because "I'm only deviating a little. What harm can it do?"

Well, I'm finding out that there is no such thing as a "little cheat", even with an otherwise healthy diet. And yes, some of it might be pregnancy related. But let's face it: food that isn't good for you isn't good for you. (And by you, I mean me.) Pregnant or not, I should not be eating what I know I should not be eating. Logic, and experience, tells me that unhealthy food has unhealthy consequences.

So, starting today, no more junk. At all. Not even if it's just at work. Not even a teeny, tiny taste. Because it's not worth it. I hate feeling this way. I hate not going to the gym because I spent the afternoon feeling yucky. I hate not wanting to make dinner because I have no appetite. I hate pushing my husband away, when he gets home from work and wants to hug me, because my tummy is upset.

And I hate to think about what I might be doing my baby. Bottom line: I know better, but I won't feel better, unless I eat better.

Here's to a brand new week, and finally feeling good.

P.S. I mentioned in my last post that I might have caught a cold, but thankfully, I'm pretty sure I didn't. The sore throat has come and gone, and no other symptoms have popped up. So at least in that respect, I'm feeling good. But I know I can improve a whole lot more!

P.P.S. How do you like my blog's new look?

I'm Too Lazy To Give This A Proper Title

I am now 30 weeks pregnant. This is my 30 week belly.



Let's compare to my 27 week belly:



I swear I'm not any bigger than I was three weeks ago. Of course, I only just gained back the weight that I lost when I had the flu (plus a few pounds extra).

I can just hardly believe that I only have 10 weeks left. It seems so soon, and I'm so not ready! Also I'm very aware of how small I am for how far along I am. I hope this means I have a small (but healthy) baby. My mother-in-law just loves to remind me how big my husband was when he was born, and how many stitches she got because of his big head.

My mom told me both her babies were tiny and perfectly healthy. I know which advice I'm going with. (Advice is totally not the right word, but I can't think of a better one. Pregnancy brain.)

I'm experiencing plenty of breathlessness these days. I try to sit up straight at work, or put my arms over my head for a minute or two. And if anyone is watching me closely, they'll see me tug at my bra many times during the day. And I no longer care if someone sees me. I just need to breathe! My mom told me to get a tiny little fan. But I'm pretty sure they're hand held, and I need both my hands to enter orders.

So, just like heartburn, I will try and put up with it as best I can until this baby comes out. I've heard plenty of women say that they miss being pregnant, and right now, I do not understand. What I can understand is having a hard time getting used to not feeling someone move around inside of you. But miss being pregnant? Not possible.

I've been doing plenty of reading lately. It may not come as a surprise that it's all pregnancy and childbirth related, but I haven't read much of anything is SO LONG.

Also, I think we're finally going to take a childbirth class! We've been looking into different ones, and it just seems like none of them are working out. Well, there was an opening for one that just started recently, and it was highly recommended by my midwife. But after doing some research on the woman, the class, and the book she uses, I refused to go to that one.

I'm going to be completely honest: she and her methods weird me out to the max. I know she offers a lot of great information for natural childbirth, but she goes into a lot of other stuff that I'm not comfortable with. For example, on her blog, she featured artwork from her last birth class that she taught. She asks every woman to draw a picture of themselves in labor or giving birth, as a way to get in touch with their inner birth warrior goddess. I'm not even joking. This is a part of the class.

She's really into art, poetry, and feeling connected to "our earth mother." As someone who believes in one God who created the heavens and the earth, and His Son Jesus who died for our sins, I would not find her class helpful at all. I would rather take a class at the hospital (which would be geared more toward hospital births) than take her class. I'm not sure why my midwife recommended it.

But we are taking a class, one that I think will be very helpful, and not weird. It's a private class, because her public class is at the same time as my husband's community college classes. She will be coming to our house for three two-hour sessions, and she will also give us DVD's to watch on our own time. Which means that my friend will (hopefully) get to watch them with us. I'm glad, because I want her to feel as ready as possible (as she is planning on being here for my labor).

I also bought two books that are geared specifically towards doulas (or birth coaches) and I gave one to her. I'm reading the other one, and then we will compare notes. I'm loving my book already (even though it's technically not for me). I'm finding it extremely informative and helpful. Since it's such a thick book, and my husband is already so busy, I've decided I'm going to highlight the parts that I feel are important for him to read, so that he doesn't have to go through the entire thing.

I think I will also use the information from both books to make cue cards for all of us, so that we'll having quick reference material when I'm in labor. I'm sure I'm not the only one who will forget everything I read when labor hits. We'll all be too excited and nervous.

I know I talk of nothing else these days, but it's kind of hard not to. I think about it 24/7. It's by far the biggest thing happening in my life right now. But there are other things happening too.

Like....my husband is taking a couple of classes to finish up his transfer degree. Then he will start classes as a Junior at the University. He's going for Kineisiology and Exercise Science, as he feels this will help him become a better CrossFit coach, and it will definitely help with his full time job in the fish oil industry. He hates being this busy, but he's really absorbing everything he's learning thus far, and after he gets home from his classes, he explains to me what he learned as he applies it to life. Most of the time it goes over my head, but it makes me happy to see that he really does understand it!

He also just got back from a business trip to California. Yeah, he's pretty much the luckiest guy in the world. His company paid for him to go to California for the weekend, plus paid him for working during the weekend. I won't get into the details, but needless to say, HE LOVED IT. He misses it already. Three days there and he's ruined for Washington, or any other place. He would seriously love to live there.

And I must be crazy for not wanting to live there. I think, for me, it's the fact that we don't know anyone there. I already left my all my family and friends once (in Manitoba). I don't want to leave my family and friends again. Also, it's so hot there! Sure, it can get kind of depressing with all the rain and lack of sun in the winter. But the temperatures are never too warm or too cold. And we have mountains. But if it's his dream, and God's will, of course I will go.

In other news, I think I caught a cold. I noticed this morning that my throat hurt, and I was kind of dragging all day. I actually left work an hour early, because I had pretty much stopped being useful. I've been resting (but not sleeping) all afternoon and evening, and I don't know if I feel a whole lot better, but I definitely don't feel worse. I'm just going to be careful that I don't push myself.

And yes, I'm drinking tea with lemon and honey. I feel like I've had more tea in the past couple of months than I have in the past 25 years. I'm almost sick of tea, but it helps, so I drink it.

Speaking of work, my job is going well. I received very high praises from my supervisor. She can't believe how well I'm doing, considering I haven't been doing order entry for that long. So that felt really good hear. Not that I doubted myself. But it's always nice to have someone appreciate your work.

We've been working hard at the backlog that builds up every year before Thanksgiving, and it finally feels like we're getting it under control. Just a couple of weeks ago, our bins were bulging with order forms, and now I can easily see us getting to the point where we'll have almost nothing to do for a while! And then it will pick up again, and then it will get really crazy, but by that time, I'll be at home with my new baby. I'm so glad I don't have to be there for another insane summer. It's just so stressful.

Oh, I forgot to write up there with all the other pregnancy symptoms that our Little One has really discovered my ribcage. It doesn't hurt really bad, but it's definitely uncomfortable. Also, the baby's movements feel different now that s/he is getting bigger and bigger. A lot of things feel kind of funny, or not nice. The baby can really put the pressure on in lots of different places, and it often doesn't feel good. I still can't decipher head from bum from feet from hands, but I like to think I have an idea.

And I'm trying to not be worried about my size or slow weight gain. I don't understand how women at this stage can just eat and eat and eat. My stomach doesn't have any room for tons of food! If anything, my appetite is smaller than ever. A combination of heartburn and lack of room often have me wishing that I didn't have to eat at all. But I do have to eat, so I try. Kind of reminds me of my first trimester...

But I find that I'm up at night more and more with heartburn or an upset stomach. Combined with need to pee all the time, and sleep is definitely not what it used to be. Even with my calcium-magnesium supplement. (Which I HIGHLY recommend to anyone and everyone. It helps with any muscle or joint pain, and it helps you sleep. If you don't have heartburn and a bladder the size of a walnut and a baby who loves to party at night.)

Speaking of Cal-Mag, I haven't taken mine yet, and bedtime is only an hour away. So I'll end with this: Art sent me flowers at work on Friday, because "I've been such a trooper, carrying our baby around for 30 weeks and I deserve them."