April 5, 2011

Sophia's Birth Story: Part 1

It all started on Monday, March 14, 2011, at 6:17 am. I had my very first contraction.

Now, up until that point, I had never experienced any Braxton Hicks, so I thought maybe I was finally feeling those. (After all, I was only 37.5 pregnant. First time moms NEVER go into labor, naturally, that early.) What did the contractions feel like? For me, I felt it all in my hips. That contraction (and all the rest that followed) didn't feel like a cramp, and it didn't feel like a tightening. It felt like an ache, in my already aching hips. But it had a beginning, and it had an end, so I knew it was...something.

I made note of it, and continued making breakfast and getting ready for work. Exactly 20 minutes later, I had another one, and again 20 minutes after that. I made note of those ones as well, but didn't tell Art, because I didn't feel that there was anything to tell. I had three light contractions, and I knew it didn't necessarily mean anything was going to happen. (I also had some bloody show, so with that combination, I knew that I would probably have the baby that week, but I didn't assume it would be that day.)

I went to work, and continued timing them as I felt them, while also trying to get some work done. They were anywhere from 5 to 30 minutes apart. (I think some of them were so mild that I couldn't quite distinguish them from the discomfort I was already feeling.) After a few hours of that, I finally decided to talk to my supervisor. I wasn't sure if should stay at work or not. I mean, I could work just fine. But what should I do?

She told me to call my midwife, and my midwife told me to go home and see if a change of activity would change anything, and to update her as needed. So I went home (and lied to my coworkers about why I was leaving. I didn't want everyone to get all excited only to have me show up at work the next day, still pregnant).

I then proceeded to clean the entire apartment, and I went to Target, and I blogged, and I napped, and the whole time, I was having mild contractions that didn't bother me at all. They did eventually settle into a 5-minute pattern, but I still wasn't convinced that I was in real labor.

I called Art, and my friend Sozan, just to give them a head's up, just in case. I also talked to my mom, and spent a lot of time on Facebook, emailing with friends (mostly Callie, who was excited and curious and wanted to know all the details).

At 3:10 the contractions started getting stronger (yes, I remember the exact time, because I wrote down on my paper "just got stronger"). It was at that point, or shortly after, that I didn't want to sit anymore, but I still wanted to use the laptop. So I grabbed a box from the closet, set it on the coffee table, and put the laptop on the box so I could stand at the computer.

By 6:00 the contractions got stronger again, and I had to start pacing. I walked in circles around the island in our kitchen, and then when the contraction was over, I would walk back over to the laptop and continue whatever I was doing. (I figured out very quickly that I could only walk clockwise around the island. I tried walking counter clockwise, but I felt like it made the contraction worse. I don't know what happens to a woman's brain during labor that makes those details so important, but that's what worked for me.)


[I took this picture at 7:30 pm. I had been in labor for 13 hours. Five hours after snapping this photo, Sophia was born.]

Art got home around this time, and for a while, he just watched me do my thing. I don't think he knew what to think, and I didn't need any help during my contractions just yet, so he spent most of the evening on the computer, waiting for...I don't know. I guess he was waiting for something to change, or for me to need his help.

Another hour went by, and I asked Art to start timing the contractions, because I needed to call my midwife again. I knew by this time that I was in real labor, and even though I assumed I had a long night ahead of me, I thought she should know that things were finally progressing, and I needed to give her details.

She kept me on the phone for several minutes so she could hear me have a couple of contractions. She basically wanted to know if I could talk through them, which I could. (I didn't want to, but I could.) She deduced that I wasn't in serious labor yet, and told me I had two options at that point: I could have her come over and sweep my membranes and really get things going, or I could do whatever I needed to do to relax and stop labor, get some sleep, and continue labor in the morning.

I was discouraged at this point, because labor seemed serious to me, and I hadn't wanted to be "that" woman who overreacted to early labor. She told me to think it over, keep timing the contractions, and to call her back in an hour with my decision.

It wasn't long before I decided that pacing during the contractions wasn't helping, so I got on my hands and knees and rested my face against a yoga ball, and simply breathed through each contraction. Art left the computer and started encouraging me, and reminding me to take deep long breaths. I didn't even ask him to do that, he just seemed to know that I needed his help now.

After a few of those contractions, I told him I wanted to get into the bathtub. I could no longer relax during a contraction, but I needed to be able to relax between contractions.

And once I got in the tub?

Things changed VERY quickly. Suddenly I was yelling for Art to "Make the water hotter!" "Get me a cool cloth for my face!" "Come back and press on my back!" "Keep timing the contractions!" "Squeeze my hands!" "Harder!" "No, that's not working!" I was also vocalizing through each contraction, and I needed the counter pressure on my lower back, and my poor husband... :) (He was overwhelmed, but I think he did a great job.)

He got in touch with my friend Sozan, and she and her husband finally showed up. I think her husband was a little worried. I mean, not one of us had ever witnessed or heard a woman in labor before, so he kept wondering if everything was okay, and if what he was hearing was normal.

Art had to call my midwife, because I couldn't talk anymore. While he was on the phone with her, my contractions changed, and suddenly I was having pushing contractions. (I have no idea when I went through transition.) My midwife heard me in the background, and told us to get to the Birth Center ASAP.

[Btw, I read somewhere that pushing contractions feel like vomiting, but downwards. And for me, that's exactly what it was like. The sudden tightening, the involuntary grunt...I actually thought I was going to throw up at first. Then I realized what was happening. And it's unstoppable. I couldn't resist them if my life depended on it. Also? The pushing contractions felt good. Maybe it's because the dominating sensation was the push, and I didn't notice the pain.]

Here's where it gets hilarious. Art had to convince me to get out of the tub and get dressed, which was the last thing I wanted to do at this point, but I knew I needed to. I ended up sitting on the toilet and having contractions there while Art attempted to clothe me. (At one point, I yelled at him to get out of the bathroom, because I was trying to go to the bathroom. Which I didn't exactly explain. Poor guy...)

He managed to get me into underwear and pants, but when he wanted to put socks on me, I yelled that I didn't want to wrestle with socks. In my mind, the socks were too tight, and it seemed like it would take a lot of effort to put them on. So barefoot into my shoes I went.

Then Art wanted me to put on a shirt, but again, it seemed like it would be really constricting, and I was NOT interested. I requested a zip-down sweater instead, and he complied. I should mention that this was at 10:30 at night, in the middle of March. I wasn't dressed for the weather at all, but I didn't care.

Art and my friends packed up the car, and in between contractions I still had the clarity of mind to tell Art to put a towel in the passenger seat, just in case. Once everything was ready to go, my friend Sozan held out her hands to me and said in her sweet, gentle way, "Okay Jenene, after your next contraction, I'm going to help you to the car."

Yeah, that didn't happen either. After the next contraction, I bolted right past her, out the door, ran down three flights of stairs, and waddled as fast as I could to the car. I did not want to be on the staircase, outside of someone's apartment when I had my next contraction. I made it to the car, got in the passenger seat kneeling, facing backwards, and?

My water broke.

Stay tuned for Part 2...

March 29, 2011

Mommy and Baby: Two Weeks.

As of today, Sophia is two weeks old. I cannot believe that two weeks has already gone by.

This also means that my mom is leaving very soon, but let's not think about that right now.

At the moment, I've got my little girl snuggled and sleeping in the Moby wrap, and I was attempting to go through a massive pile of clothes that we received from one of Art's Filipino Aunties. And then I decided to just go on the computer instead.

Don't worry, I haven't forgotten about Sophia's birth story. I'm almost done writing it, but I haven't had a ton of time to work on it. [Partly because we've been going out pretty much every day. And partly because I've been trying to organize a ton of baby pictures, but every time I open up my pictures folder, my computer slows right down to a crawl.]

But I promise: that post WILL go up before she graduates from college. ;)

Quick prayer request: it seems our little sweet pea is not gaining weight like she should. Ideally she would be back up to her birth weight by now, but she is several ounces shy of that (and has been for a few days). I've seen a lactation consultant twice, and they, along with my doctor, keep telling me that I'm doing everything right, and that Sophia is healthy.

I think the problem might be that Sophia doesn't eat with gusto when she's at the breast. She likes to get sleepy during feeding time, and she ends up burning the calories that she's taking in with prolonged, weak sucking. I'm trying not to be too worried about it (but that's akin to trying not to breathe. I'm just being a typical new momma). I know that I can always supplement for a while if I have to, but the point is that I want my little girl to grow.

Your prayers would be much appreciated.

And speaking of feeding, I must end this post because it's time for lunch for this one!

March 21, 2011

Mommy and Baby Update

Today is the first day since giving birth that I have had more than 20 minutes on the computer. So far, I have spent it reading blogs.

Sophia didn't eat very much at her last feeding, so I don't think I have much more time to be on here. Which means today will not be the day where I share her birth story.

But I will give an update.

She is six days old today, and her umbilical cord stump fell off in the middle of the night. When she was two days old, she had lost 9 ounces. At three days old, she gained back one ounce. She will be weighed today, and I'm praying that a few more ounces have been added.

She is a very sleepy girl, and hardly fusses at all. Which is a good thing, except when it comes to feeding. It takes an hour or more to get her fully fed, and sometimes (like the last feeding), she just falls asleep without getting as much as I think she could (and should), so then I know we'll barely make it two hours between feedings.

Actually, I would like to ask for your prayers about this one. I know it's not bad that she's a sleepy feeder, but what is bad is that she doesn't suck vigorously, which means she's not drawing enough breast into her mouth, which means she's only getting tiny sips when she needs to be gulping.

We went to see a lactation consultant last week, and I was given a nipple shield, which has helped. But it's not meant to be used forever. I keep praying that Sophia will learn to breastfeed without it. I don't think I'd be as worried if she wasn't also jaundiced. So yeah. Prayers are greatly appreciated.

Also, since she doesn't fuss a lot, she rarely cries when she's hungry. So we sleep with her in our bed, and I'm learning what her hunger cues are. I never thought I'd be a cosleeper, but now it just makes sense. I love having her that close at night, and I'm not worried about rolling over on her or suffocating her. Plus, I feed her right there in the bed at night, so once we're done, we can just lie down and go to sleep.

And how am I doing? I am healing well. I'm probably on my feet more than I should be, (and more than my midwife would like me to be), but sitting for long periods of time also hurts. Plus, I feel like the movement is helping me heal, as long as I don't move in such a way that would damage the area where I was stitched. I'm still very careful about that.

My friend Sozan, and Art's parents were here for two whole days after I gave birth. I am so very grateful for their help. I was able to stay in bed and just concentrate on me and Sophia, and they took care of everything else. And just when they had to go home, my mom arrived, and she'll be here for two weeks.

And after that, the church is going to set up a meal chain for me. I continue to be amazed and humbled by all the love and support and help and generosity and encouragement that is around me. God is so good. So very very good.

Art went back to work today. It was wonderful to have a full week with him at home, and he had the option of taking more time off. But he is now the sole source of income for us. I think it was hard for him to leave this morning, but that means he'll spend all evening cuddling with her to make up for it. He's such a good dad.

Well, I expect Sophia to be calling any minute now (although she's cuddling with Grandma right now, so I might have a few more minutes yet). But I need to make sure that I get some food in my tummy.

I'll leave you with a couple of pictures of our sweet girl. Isn't she the prettiest girl in the world? :)